An Open Letter To My Future Employer

This is what I want — and need — to say

I’m not going to beat around the bush. In my mind, I was fired from my last ‘proper’ job. After two years of struggling to keep a store open and functioning on half the staff we should have had, I was suffering from intense burnout.

From trying to keep a team together that was falling apart, being picked like loose strings at the seam. I watched team members that I had seen every day be invited into a box room with someone in HR I recognised by name, documents on the table, to then never return to work.

Every day the ones that were left were scared they were next, me included.

Feeling as though your every move is being watched, as though you’re walking on eggshells, invites a tension in the air like no other. It was suffocating.

After two years, I did the only thing I knew to save myself. I checked out.

But I feel as though I failed. I failed my team. I failed me. And I am carrying that with me like a ball and chain locked around my ankle, weighing down my every step. Applying for jobs, trying to re-enter the professional world after what feels like a years hiatus, has brought everything bubbling up to the surface.

So I’m taking control of the narrative. I’m not going to leave it up to my CV with career gaps and a cover letter with a word limit to put across all I want — and need — to say.

If you’re looking for a fresh grad out of University, you might as well stop reading now.

But if you’re looking for someone who committed a quarter of their life to a company, worked hard, put in plenty of overtime and laid their heart and soul on the line because of how much they believed in what they worked for, then by all means please keep on reading.

My experience has been garnered through life, from moving countries at the age of 18 with no financial support from my parents, uprooting for a promotion and starting over in a new city, to handing in my notice at work, packing everything up and flying to Australia to find work there. Every challenge I’ve faced I’ve dealt with and grown as a result.

I had to figure out how to support myself when the whole world shut down and I was stuck thousands of miles from where I’d call home, with no job to support myself.

I’m resilient, independent and determined.

I’ve learnt how to communicate and connect with people from many walks of life and worked under many different management styles, with the opportunities to lead and discover my own style. I’ve made my mistakes and I’ve learned from them.

I know I would be an asset, but not to just any company.

Through climbing the career ladder and following the money, I got a glimpse into a world that viewed success in a superficial light, caught up in material wealth. Its entire foundation was based on appearance and vanity. It made me doubt myself, my values and what I stood for. I questioned why it was causing me to look so inward, placing a magnifying glass on my insecurities and sense of self-worth.

I realise now I was trying so hard to fit in. It was cutthroat and ruthless, dog eats dog. And it went against my very principles.

I’m looking for a company that is open and transparent. One that is authentic in its vision and how it seeks to accomplish it, values every person as an individual and how they actively contribute to achieving that vision.

But more importantly, a company that reflects similar values to myself of collaboration, individuality, creative expression and integrity.

Is that you?

If you think so, please shoot me a message on my LinkedIn.